SPN next gen, and my horrible life

[hells_half_acre]

Lately I've discovered the existence of SPN-Next Gen...which is made up of a group of people who write stories about Ben Braeden, Claire Novak, and Jesse Turner (the antichrist) hunting together when they're all grown up. I must admit, I kind of love it. My favourite so far is this series on insanejournal. It's gen so far, but there are also people elsewhere on the interweb who write it as a threesome (which I also like.)

Anyway, my favourite part of all the stories is them discovering how connected they are. I suppose it's the stuff of crossover lovers everywhere: watching the characters discover what you already know. 

A couple of similarities I've discovered between all writers: Everyone makes Ben into Dean's biological son. Jesse always ends up being a weird loner. Claire is a badass.

In other news, I'm horribly depressed about my life again. Work has been horrible this month. I'm signing up tomorrow to be an extra, in the hopes of making some cash - but there is no guarantee for jobs there. The more I don't do anything, the more I feel like I CAN'T do anything - like, I literally don't know how to work any job...having no confidence severely undermines one's ability to find a new career.  

 

Also, being horribly depressed and stressed out about finances does not lead to feeling very creative. I've got about half of another demented'verse piece written, but haven't touched it for a few days. I started going through and working on my novel again, only to discover that the beginning was so craptastic that it was actually demotivating....though, I have been working on ideas for the middle, so hopefully all hope is not lost there. Sort of sucks, because I have all this free time because work is sucking, but I end up being depressed about work sucking and not getting anything done anyway. I get a lot more done when I'm busy and financially secure.

 

Anyway, yeah...so, that's what's up with me. I want the show to come back on :P

Comments

[nwspaprtaxis.livejournal.com]

This The more I don't do anything, the more I feel like I CAN'T do anything - like, I literally don't know how to work any job...having no confidence severely undermines one's ability to find a new career. is EXACTLY how I feel and why I feel like I royally suck and will never gain employment. *gives you a beer in solidarity*

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

*drinks beer* thanks!

Wish I had magic words to make us both feel better. :P

[nwspaprtaxis.livejournal.com]

Bleh. I don't have any either... and I'm sitting in my living room feeling like a failure. :P

[cordelia-gray.livejournal.com]

:(

I know the feeling very well, that kind of paralysis where you feel so overwhelmed by all the things in your life that you can't begin to do anything about any of them.

*joins you all in a beer*

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

Exactly. *clicks beers together*

Hopefully the feeling will pass, or I'll be able to figure out SOMETHING.

[mymuseandi.livejournal.com]

I get a lot more done when I'm busy and financially secure

Me too. It's quite funny that you thought to do a lot of things when you are free, but turns out you do more things when you are busy to start with!

Can't drink a beer, but i'll toast a Shirley Temple for both of us :)

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

Shirley Temple's work too!

Yeah, there has to be that balance of free time - if I have too much, I just end up lying in bed staring at the ceiling wondering why my life sucks instead of getting the stuff done that I wanted to get done in my free time. :P

[msninacat.livejournal.com]

I'm very sorry you're stuck in that rut. I'm buried in mine. I just have to tell myself it's for my family. If it was just me, I'd be wallowing in the rut with you. ♥ I'm sure that your luck will change soon.

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I hope you get unburied soon. :P