hells_half_acre: (DarkSam)
[personal profile] hells_half_acre
I wrote down a lot of notes, but I think it's mainly just me copying out dialog. This episode has some great dialog...

As soon as the doctor said that monsters weren't real - I thought he was the monster. So, good misdirect Show! :-P

The wraith is faking suicides wrong...it's down the tracks, not across. Obviously the wraith was never around depressed teenagers (or grad students).

Glenwood Psychiatric Hospital
-Ahhahahaha, Glenwood Dr. is the street that the Supernatural studio is on. 

So, the wraith later points out how stupid it was for the boys to get into the hospital by telling the truth. In all fairness to the boys though, it WAS a sure fire way to get admitted. Also, it would have only been stupid if the monster was intelligent. The last time they did an inside job, it was a ghost who couldn't make them. So, it was a gamble, sure, but I don't think they were complete idiots.

"The apocalypse wasn't his fault. There was this other demon, Ruby, and she got him addicted to demon blood and near the end he was practically chugging the stuff. My brother's not evil. He was just....high."
-So, not only do I find this speech by Dean amusing, it also makes me go "awww"...because it goes to show that the brothers really have moved completely past what happened 6 months ago. It also leads me to believe that sometime off screen, Sam did tell Dean about the nurse that he drank dry.

I also love the little pat on the arm Dean gives Sam at the end of the meeting with the psychiatrist...and the way Sam sort of looks down at his arm afterwards, like "what the heck was that?" Hahaha...I love these boys.

"Alright, you can go ahead and take down your pants"
"Wait, what? What...for?"

-Hahaha, poor Sam...this season really is all about messing with his...um...nether regions.

"Martin saved Dad's ass more times than we can count"
-It's nice to know that John was capable of human error too, and occasionally needed someone's help. Dean should really keep this in mind before he gets on the "I'm a complete failure at life" train of thought.

"I just think it's best we keep busy, that's all?"
"Better than what?"
"Nothing...ok look, last few weeks, you've kind been worrying me."

-I'm completely failing at having Dean have worrying behaviour in the fic I'm currently writing that takes place between 5x10 and 5x11. But, ah well...I'll just ignore this dialog and repeat to myself that Harry Potter crossovers aren't canon compliant anyway. I wonder though, what behaviour of Dean's has been worrying...obviously, they HAVEN'T been keeping busy. Which leads me to believe that they've been sitting around sulking somewhere...probably Dean's been getting plastered? In my head, it's something like that.

"Actually, I'm going to be putting you in the afternoon group"
"What? Why?"
"Well, frankly, the relationship you have with your brother seems dangerously codependent. I think a little time apart will do you both good."

-I love Sam's "what is he talking about? This guy is crazy!" face, and Dean's "but I don't want to be apart!" face...and man, Dean's little pathetic wave reminds me so much of the scene in Strange Brew where Bob and Doug MacKenzie part ways for the first time in their lives (and yes, I'm relating Supernatural to a Canadian movie about drinking beer).

Then we have Dean playing checkers all alone! I remember when I first watched this, I thought "well, Dean's having fun acting crazy..." in retrospect, I have to wonder who he thinks he's playing with.

"Paranoid Schizophrenic with a narcissistic personality disorder and religious psychosis."
-What really makes me interested in this diagnoses is that it's Dean diagnosing HIMSELF.

Here we learn the following:
-Dean gets 3 to 4 hours of sleep every couple of nights. (This is bad)
-Dean has about 50 drinks a week (this actually isn't THAT bad. That's around 7 drinks a day, and he doesn't specify what kind of drinks or when he has them. I know some high-functioning alcoholics and I think they have far more than that. Sure, Dean's liver has probably looked better, but *shrug*)
-Dean has never had a relationship last longer than 2 months (Neither have I! THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS! Some people PREFER to be single...geez...society and it's stupid pressure to hook-up and procreate.)

"Dean, hey, you ok?"
"I just got thraped"

-BY YOURSELF!! Holy hell, Dean...no wonder you repress things. You are entirely too self-aware, methinks.

*Wendy kisses Dean*
"Maybe this place isn't so bad after all"
"Dude, you cannot hit that"
"Oh...so torn"

-Poor Dean, and that pesky moral code...that is mostly Sam's moral code at the moment.

I love Sam's angry face! Aww Sam....so angry.

As I was watching the morgue scene, I realized that that's totally an actor on a slab that is getting his head all felt up by Jared.....hello jealousy.

"Look! His brain's been sucked dry!"

-HAHAHA, I love Sam's enthusiasm. I keep repeating this, but I absolutely love how Sam's grown so accustomed to autopsies that he can now not only perform them himself, but he doesn't think twice about sawing the top of some dude's head off. Now, that all being said, and any pathologists out there can correct me if I'm wrong - but wouldn't Sam be a hell of a lot messier with bloody if he just sawed someone's skull open? I'm just saying. How he manages to only get his fingers bloody is beyond me.

Way to think on your feet, Dean. ;)

"Why you? Why do you have to hunt monsters? Why don't you let someone else do it?"
"Can't find anybody else that dumb...It's my job. Somebody's got to save people's asses - yours included."
"So is there a quota? How many people do you have to save?"
"All of them"
"All of them? You think you have to save everyone?"
"Yup. The whole wide world of sports"
"How? ...believe me, whatever you've got, I've heard weirder."
"It's the end of the world [...] and if I don't stop it and save everyone then no one will and we all die."
"That's horrible"
"Tell me about it."
"I mean, apocalypse of no apocalypse, monsters or no monsters, that is a crushing weight to have on your shoulders - to feel like 6 billion lives depend on you. God, how do you get up in the morning?"
"That's a good question."

-Let's analyze this by going back briefly 2 episodes to The Real Ghostbusters, where "Dean" told Dean this: "To be Sam and Dean, to wake up every morning and save the world, to have a brother who would die for you - well, who wouldn't want that?"

I think what we are getting now is Dean looking at the same thing that cheered him up in that episode, in a negative light....to wake up every morning and HAVE to save the world, because no one else will, because it all depends on you. It's not exciting. It's not fulfilling...it's a crushing pressure that is driving Dean to an early grave. I just think it's interesting that in both cases, it's, sort of, Dean telling himself something...a fellow roleplaying as Dean tells Dean that his life is wonderful, and projection of Dean's psyche tells Dean the same thing, but makes it out to sound horrible. Basically, this is when we get a clear indication that Dean is falling into a pretty deep depression. The things that used to make him happy no longer bring him any joy.

*Wendy kisses Sam*
"I want him now, he's larger"
"You've had worse"

-Hahaha...ah Sam. I love how he doesn't kiss back though. 


"You always were a happy drunk"
-I know some people were like "no, he isn't! Sam's a miserable drunk!"...but think about it, people! We've only seen Sam drunk ONCE. That's hardly enough to spot a trend. I much prefer Dean's version...I keep picturing teenage Sam, all sloppy and happy (because you KNOW they didn't wait until legal drinking age to get plastered).

"Well, come on, you've been like half-crazy for a long time. I mean, since you got back from hell or since before that..."
-I love you High!Sam. Though, on a serious note: Awww...this totally confirms that all last season (S4) Sam really was worried about Dean's mental state (as well he should have been). Also, I think it was a line in one of the new episodes where Dean refers to himself as a head-case.

"It's okay, hey hey, look at me. It's okay, because you're my brother, and I love ya....BOOP!"
-This is my absolute favorite part of the episode. Sam is so ERNEST and Dean is so uncomfortable...and you can actually see Sam's eyes zero in on Dean's nose...and then he's just so delighted! Ahahaha...So good. I like it better than "pudding!"...but that's just me.

"You got Ellen and Jo killed. You shot Lucifer, but you couldn't gank him. You couldn't stop Sam from killing Lilith and oh, you broke the first seal. All you do is fail. Did you really think that you, Dean Winchester, with a GED and a give'em hell attitude, were going to beat the devil? Please. The world is going to burn and there is nothing you can do about it."
-Dean really knows how to rip himself apart.

"The look in your eyes when you came after me. It was like you were barely even human - like a man possessed."
-Now, I'm no psychiatrist, but for some reason this doesn't strike me as a good thing to say...maybe I'm just overprotective of Sam.

"Dean, what's wrong?"
"It's not the demon blood, Sam. It never was"
"the problem was you. It was always you. The lies and your arrogance, the black spot on your soul."

-Sam really knows how to rip himself apart.

Is it wrong of me to really enjoy Sam fighting invisible enemies all angry-like? Man, I have a seriously messed up kink for anger.

"You look like hell, boy"
-I love how it's a marker of John's old friends that they all call Dean "boy" or "son" - and Dean doesn't bat an eyelash at it.

"Maybe it's the ghost of my dad"
"No, Dean, focus on the wraith. Dean, focus!"

-Poor Dean...it always circles around back to his father.

"You have to go out there and kill that thing. I'll take care of her"
"I can't"
"You have to, you have no choice, son!"

- Really, this is what it all boils down to. Probably Dean's whole life until now boils down to this.

"I don't make crazy. I just crank up what's already there. You build your own hell, but I give you the legos"
-I'm just including this to reiterate that Dean and Sam really know how to rip themselves apart.

"You still crazy?"
"Not any more than usual"

-I like this line

"She was right"
"No she wasn't. She's dead."

-No one who is dead can be right, folks!

"Most of the time, I can hide it, but I'm angry. I'm mad at everything. I used to be mad at you and dad and then Lilith and now it's Lucifer. And I make excuses. I blame Ruby or the demon blood, but it's not their fault. It's not them. It's me. It's inside me. I am mad all the time and I don't know why."
"Stop. Stop it. So what if you are? What are you going to do? Take a leave of absence? You going to say yes to Lucifer? What?"
"No, of course not"
"Exactly. And that's exactly what you're going to do. You're going to take all that crap and you're going to bury it. Because that's how we keep going. That's how we don't end up like Martin. Are you with me? Man, are you with me?"
"I'm with you"

-Ok, so the obvious response to this is that Dean is not giving very good mental health advice...however, that's not what I'm going to talk about. I actually think that Dean is saying something a little worthwhile here. Dean is basically saying that it doesn't matter what Sam is...if he's angry or sad or happy or whatever...what matters is what he DOES. Sam's faults don't matter - what matters is Sam's STRENGTHS.

Now, that being said, interestingly enough, I read an article the other month in Scientific American: Mind, that talked about the different forms depression takes. Surprisingly (to me), in most males, depression actually causes them to be irrationally angry and more easily enraged. I've actually scene this first hand, since I have a good friend who (I believe) suffers from depression from time to time...and also ends up punching things a lot. (Things, not people). 

And, finally, we can't really blame Dean for his poor advice...basically, he's just telling Sam what works for him. That Dean is also messed up, but he just focuses on the task at hand (think of Bobby making him focus in Abandon All Hope) and he gets through it. Repression isn't good, but at the same time...do they really have the time to crack up and put themselves back together? What are their real choices here?

Anyway, I really like this episode.

Until next time...

Date: 2010-10-04 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] borgmama1of5.livejournal.com
This episode definitely improves with age, in hindsight with what comes after. Especially with your comments.

Still seems like some holes in the telling big enough to drive a truck through, however, like the lax security, and leaving Martin to face the repercussions alone...

Date: 2010-10-04 10:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] katsheswims.livejournal.com
With the Martin thing, what choice did they have but to leave him? He's already in an institution, he won't end up in jail. If they do blame him-and not the missing Sam and Dean-he will only end up in a higher security facility. Probably.

Date: 2010-10-04 11:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hells-half-acre.livejournal.com
Yes, I think Martin can cover his own ass quite well. After all, he's been there for years and probably has a record of being cooperative...so they'd probably believe him if he acted upset and blamed everything on the missing Sam and Dean.

But yes, I definitely enjoyed this episode more the second time through.

Date: 2010-10-04 10:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] katsheswims.livejournal.com
I really like this episode, too.

I was also mad at the doctor who was talking to Sam after his 'attack'. It seems to me that saying a man was 'less than human' and acting 'possessed' when he is (supposedly) having problems with delusions involving demons and monsters is not a good idea....

I prefered high!Sam and the nose thing to the pudding thing as well.

I loved Dean in this episode. It was sad to see him coming apart, but we did get a close up of his psyche. (and Sam's some, but I enjoyed Dean's more) I'm always trying to analyse the boys...

Date: 2010-10-04 11:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hells-half-acre.livejournal.com
It seems to me that saying a man was 'less than human' and acting 'possessed' when he is (supposedly) having problems with delusions involving demons and monsters is not a good idea....

Yes, exactly! It doesn't seem like very good practice to me.

We're always trying to analyse the boys...it's fun to have an episode where they really come apart - no matter how sad it is. We are twisted that way :P

But yeah...we get Dean's self-esteem/failure issues, and Sam's fear of rejection...and both boil over into making Dean a nervous wreck and Sam an angry ball of anger.

Date: 2010-10-04 11:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] trystan830.livejournal.com
"You still crazy?"
"Not any more than usual"

i like this line too.

Date: 2010-10-05 04:27 am (UTC)
sinesofinsanity: For use in leading quests and destorying balrongs (Default)
From: [personal profile] sinesofinsanity (from livejournal.com)
I like to think of Dean's shrink as being real the first time he met her, which makes Dean's hallucinations match up better with Sam's, because then, the only people they hallucinate about in which actual sentences are spoken are people they've had conversations with. (as opposed to the meaningless "it's all your fault" white noise when Sam fights a crowd or psychosis). Like how when you dream, most of the people you talk to in dreams you've either actually talked to them before, or you've watched them have conversations in some other capacity.
That's just my thought though. And my way of explaining why Dean doesn't seem to get any therapy otherwise.

Also, after a person dies, blood congeals a bit, so it's not as thin and flow-y, plus the heart is no longer bleeding, so only the blood that was already in the head would leak out. Lastly, surrounding the brain is cerebral-spinal fluid, which had been sucked out by the whats-its, we can probably assume that the blood that was in the vessels in the brain had been sucked out too.

I liked High!Sam's "boop!" better than the "pudding" part too. :D

Date: 2010-10-05 04:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hells-half-acre.livejournal.com
Awesome! Thanks for the dead body knowledge! Haha...that scene is now more believable to me.

Also, yeah...it sort of makes sense that Dean would get some sort of one on one therapy (group-sessions not included) at some point during the 3 days they are in the hospital. So, maybe she was real for at least the first conversation...I guess we'll never know though...but it's cool to theorize about in any case.

Date: 2010-10-08 12:27 pm (UTC)
sinesofinsanity: For use in leading quests and destorying balrongs (Default)
From: [personal profile] sinesofinsanity (from livejournal.com)
lol just realized this, but I totally meant to write "beating" instead of "bleeding" there... lends a slightly new tone to the sentence. :P

Date: 2010-10-08 04:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hells-half-acre.livejournal.com
Hahaha, true. I didn't even really realize the double meaning there :P

Date: 2010-10-05 09:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mymuseandi.livejournal.com
I like Sam's facial expressions throughout this episode. It's comedic relief after the previous one, when he was all somber and serious.

"Dean, hey, you ok?"
"I just got thraped"

I didn't understand this part until i watched it a second time, but during that second time i was also thinking isn't that his subconscious and how could it do that? LOL

Date: 2010-10-05 04:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hells-half-acre.livejournal.com
Haha, that's what happens when you stop and think about everything you've been repressing over the years!! ;)


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