hells_half_acre: (Scary!Dean)
[personal profile] hells_half_acre
I don't even know what my emotions are doing...

This week, the TV schedule was all messed up in my area of the world, and the show isn't airing until 10:30pm. So, instead of going to my friends place and drinking and watching the show - I stayed home and tried to watch it on livestream on the east-coast feed.

This means that A)I'm not drunk for once, B)This post is appearing WAY earlier in the day than usual, and C)I missed five minutes of the show because the livestream cut out partway through. I was able to piece together approximately what happened in those five minutes.. but I'll still completely own up to it when I get to that part of my reaction. D) You still get song lyrics for the cut, because I listened to my iPod while I typed the first half of this reaction post.

Now to the episode!

So, we begin in Scotland in 1723... where we meet back up with Gavin, I knew exactly who he was and where this was going as soon as I saw that we were in Scotland in 1723.... and sure enough, Abaddon shows up and kidnaps our hapless doomed Scottish boy.

Then, we get to the best part of the episode, where we enter a bar where some dude is trying to tell a funny story about seagulls and a pizza - and it's obviously one of those stories where you had to be there, because he's laughing too much at his own jokes... and then before he can get to the punchline someone interrupts him. I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS. And that someone interrupts them by mentioning that he's been talking to Metatron, and we discover that all these guys hanging out at the bar and telling funny stories about seagulls are angels!!! AND I LOVE THEM. Seriously, I know want to know what that story was about the seagulls - I am now in love with this awkward comedian angel who laughs at his own jokes and doesn't realize he's telling a story where you had to be there... and MAN, I want the whole story about how these angels are adjusting and what their lives were like beforehand - and I actually want to know what the hell that story about the seagulls and the pizza was... and...and... this is where my best friend would yell "STOP FALLING IN LOVE WITH INCONSEQUENTIAL BACKGROUND CHARACTERS!" And I would say, "You might as well ask me to stop breathing, because I'd have to be dead!"

ANnnnnnnnnnnnyway... obviously I don't need alcohol to get off track.

Braggy McBraggerson gets nabbed in an alley, because loose lips sink ships.

Then we join up with the boys who are pulling up to a warehouse somewhere... and we discover that Cas has made himself a Commander of an army. Commander Cas has a nice ring to it. But we get hugs on arrival! Slightly awkward hugs! And I'll never get over how small the boys always make Misha look. Seriously... it's hilarious and way too adorable for words.

Cas wants Dean and Sam to interrogate the braggy angel... and yeah.... the fact that Dean's like "what makes you think I don't want to do it?" is like THE BIGGEST RED FLAG. Seriously, I'm kind of angry at Cas for even bringing him in, tbh.

Then we go to Crowley's command centre, where I discover that he still has that attractive demon in his employment! Yay! The guy needs to change his facial hair, but I really like the look of him otherwise... ...and cue my best friend once again yelling at me in my mind....

But even attractive demons can double-cross you! And that's exactly what attractive-demon has done with Crowley... because Abaddon has infiltrated his penthouse.

And then we get the best line from Crowley EVER... and damn but I wish I could remember exactly how it went, but something like "No one in the history of torture knows torture like the torture that I'm going to torture you with..." So awesome.

Then we get a conversation that I missed a little bit of because of the stream cutting out... but basically Abaddon reveals that she's got Gavin as her bargaining chip. Which, ironically, is SORT of the context that we last saw Gavin in. Though, this DOES mess with the timelines, because if Gavin doesn't go down with that ship.... this is why Supernatural has ALWAYS worked on closed time loops... but we'll get to that....

Anyway, Abaddon correctly calls out the fact that Crowley still has a bit of sentimentality left after his human blood addiction and can't stand to see his son tortured and killed. Again though, I wonder if she COULD kill him... closed time loops, people!

Cut to the interrogation of the braggy angel - who we discover is named Ezra (which is one of my favourite biblical names, btw... I'm kind of sad they used it for a throwaway character). Sam saves the day here, because he recognizes that 1)Dean is a LITTLE bit unhinged lately, and 2)They don't actually have to use torture to get the information they need. Sam recognizes exactly what kind of personality Ezra has and exploits it - Ezra needs to be more important than he is, Ezra NEEDS to have something to brag about.... so, Sam just let's him brag, calling into question each part of the story he wants more information on so that Ezra will tell him more to prove that he's not lying... Dean gets with the program fast.

It was an interesting choice to film it the way they did, but I really liked the choice... with the viewer as Ezra's eyes. It was kind of hilarious and kind of great.

We learn from Ezra that there's a portal to Heaven that Metatron can open at will wherever he wants. Also, we learn that Metatron is assembling both an elite guard in heaven and ground troops on earth... for what reason, we don't know.

Speaking of people who are a little slow... Gavin is being told that his no-good alcoholic dead-father is now King of Hell after selling his soul for 3 more inches of willy. I actually kind of find it hilarious, because guys with longer penises are more likely to have boys... so, for all Gavin knows, that demon deal is the reason he exists right now! :P

Oh, I think I jumped ahead there... because really the scene was just about introducing the idea that Gavin was in the future or something. I was actually surprised he recovered as quickly as he did to Abaddon inflicting extreme pain and making him loose like a half-litre of blood.

Anyway, back at Cas HQ, Ezra is inexplicably dead!

Cas asks Dean and Sam about it, and they're like "it wasn't us! You have a mole!"

AND THEN MY STREAM CUT OUT FOR FIVE MINUTES. (But from what I gathered, Cas got contacted by Gadreel who wanted to meet - and then when he went to the meeting spot he was attacked? And Sam and Dean were milling about HQ still for some reason and Crowley must have gotten in touch because Dean was thinking about the blade...)

..and then Dean has a weird flashback thingy about the blade and how it jacks him up. And Sam has to clap to get his attention when Dean's phone rings.

Crowley calls to tell him that he has Abaddon... and then the camera pans out and we see that Abaddon is right by Crowley and obviously in on the whole thing...

Crowley sends the boys to a graveyard to get the first blade, which he's stuffed inside of a fresh corpse. SUPER GROSS! And there's a hell hound guarding it. So, this is where I'm actually going to complain about something (which is usually not my thing but...)... um, this scene was pointless? It seemed to JUST be a gag-scene to allow for the juxtaposition of the boys running from a hell hound and Crowley and his son sitting by a fire reading papers...and Crowley calling the hell hound Juliet in a sweet voice... and yeah, it's not... there's no other point to it, and when you isolate a gag that much, it basically just points neon signs to the fact that it's a gag and takes away from the gag. It would have made WAY more sense for the hell hound to be sent by another demon trying to get the blade or something, like, maybe Abaddon has planned to kill them in the graveyard and get the first blade so that Dean couldn't use it against her - THAT would have made sense, and then Sam and Dean could have killed the hound or something or SOMETHING... or they should have just taken this scene out completely, because there's no point to it...and yeah, I mean, I just... it's... a writing critique I guess, and it must be a pet-peeve of mine, I guess, for me to be this annoyed by it. I just think that every word and action you put down on paper should have a reason to be there, and "for a gag" isn't a good enough reason.

Anyway, Sam correctly insists that he be the one to handle the blade until Dean needs it - Dean tells him he can handle it, but yeah...

My question is, why don't the boys ever bring rubber gloves with them when they do stuff like this? They should get those really long ones that farmers use for birthing calves.

They get the blade, and then Crowley calls them to tell them the location... and he says the code word! Poughkeepsie! And Uh, it's not exactly subtle because he has to repeat it twice, because Dean is being thick....

And then Dean doesn't even tell Sam! Noooooooo.............

Cut to Castiel meeting with Gadreel. Gadreel tells him that he had nothing to do with the attack on Castiel. Gadreel goes on about how he's trying to be a man of his word and has honour and whatnot, and Castiel is like "um, is this is what happened to you when you messed up in the past - because I have to say, you really have a knack for screwing up your life." Only in less words than that. The Castiel tries to convince Gadreel to be HIS mole. Interesting... my wonder is how much Metatron knows about all this? Is Castiel still playing into his plans or is he being a good spanner in the works?

When Dean and Sam get to the hotel where Crowley is. Dean tells Sam that Crowley told him there were demons and that Sam should check out the basement while Dean checks out the first floor... so, Dean knows it's a trap, and his response is to send Sam to the basement to keep him safe, while Dean walks into the trap by himself.

I can't help but feel that this is less Dean being overly confident because of the Mark of Cain mojo and more a symptom of the current brother troubles - because if Sam can live without Dean, but Dean can't live without Sam... Dean's willingness to walk into certain death makes a LOT of sense. Dean believes that Sam won't shed a tear for him, but meanwhile Dean can't live without Sam... so, yeah, keep Sam safe and don't care about yourself, because you don't have to worry about upsetting Sam by dying because Sam doesn't care. Or, at least, that's what I think Dean's frame of mind is at the moment...that's in no way what I think the situation ACTUALLY is.

So, while Sam's safely in the basement for no reason - Dean enters the penthouse and sees Crowley. He dispatches one demon, but Abaddon still manages to throw him against the wall, but then makes the mistake of monologing about how she's going to kill Dean slowly and then kill Gavin and then kill Crowley and... all this gives Dean enough time to realize that the Mark of Cain gives him super powers and he's able to resist Abaddon's demon magic thingy and walk towards her in a wind-machine...

And we find out when she throws him into the wall again and he drops the blade that he can actually ACCIO that sucker... (for you non-HarryPotter fans...that means he can use telekinesis to have that sucker fly back into his hand.)

Anyway, Sam runs into the windmachine room just as Dean gets a handle of the situation again and TOTALLY STABS ABADDON!!!

WHAT?!?! (I'll return to this later)

And then that's not enough, because he's also got to beat her dead corpse!! SO MUCH ANGER! And Sam is like "DEAN! THAT'S EXCESSIVE! AND THOSE SQUISHY NOISES ARE GROSS!" Or maybe that was me... anyway, Dean stops.

Then Crowley let's it slip in front of Sam that Dean knew it was a trap the whole time, and Sam is *angry face* and Dean is *don't angry face me!*

Then we get a conversation between Crowley and Dean and Sam, which they're having like...15 feet away from Gavin, but he apparently can't hear them? Anyway, Crowley doesn't want to send Gavin back in time, because his ship goes down and he dies, and Sam is like "THIS SHOW WORKS ON CLOSED TIME LOOPS! CLOSED! DO YOU WANT ANOTHER 'MY HEART WILL GO ON' UNIVERSE WHERE I LOSE ROCK PAPER SCISSORS?! DO YOU!?!?!" Or words to that effect, and Crowley is like, "Noo....?" but then asks if he can say goodbye before Dean and Sam take Gavin to figure out how to send him back in time... and he TRICKS THEM! And disappears with Gavin! Oh noes!

But my question is: WHY do they let Crowley live?! I don't understand the logic there? Is it just that they want to know whose in charge of hell? Do they figure that they can control him? Have they forgotten that he's done a whole bunch of horrible things? I'm so confused!

Crowley tells Gavin about the ship going down and then turns him loose (hopefully with some money and not just his weird 18th century clothes)... and Gavin tries to go in for a hug, because apparently his father loved him after all, but Crowley is like "Hugging is for the weak! Goodbye forever!" And Gavin is like, "you're like the worst Dad ever, but fine."

Then we get the brother fight in the car, where Dean is like "I sent you to the basement because I knew I could handle it - the Blade makes me super calm and awesome." And Sam is like "It makes you SOMETHING, but I'm not sure that it's that awesome." And Dean is like "I HAVE NOW FORMED A CODEPENDENT RELATIONSHIP WITH THE BLADE!"

And Sam is like "Maybe we should put the blade really far away from you, because you are clearly going insane."

And Dean says, "No."

And well, that's one way to end a fight, I guess.

So, things that I had to come back to:
1)With Gavin alive, what does this mean for the timeline?! Are things going to go into an alternate universe now? If Gavin doesn't get on the boat, then Bobby can't find his ring and use him against Crowley in Weekend at Bobby's - which I think was just a distraction for the fact that Sam and Dean were in Scotland?! So, maybe the plan can just work differently somehow?! I don't know... but I'm confused as to what this open time loop means...because the mythology of Supernatural clearly states that this will fuck everything up!

2)Abaddon is dead! So, whose the big bad for the finale? Just Metatron?! Crowley?! GAVIN?!! DEAN?!!? I have to say, Abaddon's death seemed sudden to me, and I guess not what I was hoping for... I mean, I knew as soon as they brought the Blade into play that Dean would most likely kill Abaddon, but part of me wanted her to be hoisted on her own petard first - because fundamentally, I felt, that her style of governing hell wasn't going to be a good one... so I kind of wanted her to reap what she sowed, you know? Rather than just being ended without seeing the folly of her ways....

I think that's it...

Next week looks really weird. I'm not sure what the heck is going on there.

I'm very concerned about where Dean is headed. Also, now that he's killed Abaddon, is he going to fulfill his promise to Cain and kill him next?!? Or will Sam have to call on Cain to somehow rescue Dean from himself?! I definitely think that this is going to be a scenario where Sam has to figure out how to rescue Dean...

So, let me know your thoughts and whatnot in comments...  standard rules apply.
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