hells_half_acre: (Shocked!Dean)
[personal profile] hells_half_acre
Alright! Home again...I've had a MODERATE amount of wine tonight, so those of you who feared for me developing alcoholism in order to please you can rest assured that it hasn't happened yet...

On with the episode, which was funnier than I thought it was going to be....

Ok, we open with a bar - from the outside it kind of looks like this private bar that I was at the other week...but it's not, and I don't know where it is in the city...but we have two people leaving and then the Mother walks up and is all "Hi, I'm a pretty girl in a nightie" and NEITHER of the dudes mention the fact that she is in a white nightgown at night with BLOOD on her - I mean, really guys? Really?! She touches one of them and does something weird to him...then she goes into the bar and does it to a whole bunch of people, and the whole place turns into a hockey riot - only with more biting. (Seriously guys, I am super scared about riots if the Canucks lose the cup...and second to that I am scared about riots if they win.)

Anyway, Sam and Dean are still chillin at Bobby's. You know, for all Eric talked about how he didn't like the Roadhouse and this was supposed to be a "road show" they really use Bobby's as a home-base SO MUCH. I mean, more and more as the seasons progress. I'm not complaining, mind you. I personally love the fact that our heroes have a home in a scrapyard.

I love the exchange with Dean about calling Cas, and then Cas's arrival. I mean, yes, as a friend pointed out, it was really juvenile humour, but it was HILARIOUS.

Dean: Why does it always have to be me that calls him? It's not like Cas lives in my ass-"
*Cas appears directly behind Dean*
Dean: CAS! Get out of my ass!
Cas: I was never in y- *confused*
hahahaa...typity type type type....I see you Destiel shippers! I SEE YOU!
Cas wants to find Eve too. (Personal Side note: I one new a pair of identical twins and one of them was named Eve...one of them was also EVIL - it's true! I can't remember if it was Eve that was the evil one or not, now, but that would be ironic)
Sam comes up with the brilliant plan of trying to find a sympathetic thing with claws - that they've met enough of them. My friend Kathleen thought of the Skinwalker in this season, but at the line I suddenly remembered hearing a rumour months and months ago about a return of Lenore. So, yeah, SPOILED! But at least I was spoiled at the last minute, because I honestly had forgotten about that rumour/spoiler until the very second Sam brought it up as a possibility.
Cas goes and retrieves her, and she's DEFINITELY seen better days. I like Lenore though, and I'm really glad we got to see her again, even though it was super sad. I was really wondering how her and her nest were fairing with all these psychic messages and whatnot - and it turns out that they were not fairing very well.
Also, apparently monsters are like video-cameras to the Mother of All. Crazy! That's a lot of cameras - that's like BRITAIN. (BIG BROTHER BURN! OH YEAH, I WENT THERE....ok, um...starting to wonder if my alcohol consumption was actually that moderate...I apologize to my British readers, you live in a lovely country and you throw nice weddings.)
Then Lenore asks a favour - to kill her. And man, it's heart breaking that she begs SAM to do it. It makes sense, because Sam was the one that she was able to convince before - Sam is the one that she has the most experience with. But man, Sam is also the one that's been two drops of blood away from being pure human himself...and yeah...and man, Jared does such a good job of turning away and screwing his eyes shut and looking pathetically helpless and sad when Castiel kills Lenore.
Personally, although Castiel just says that he did it because they were wasting time, I think he also did it to spare Sam the job, and any more begging. (Sassy fans are with me, aren't you?!?!) No matter what shenanigans Cas is up to, he's still the Winchesters' friend, and I really do think that he'd want to spare Sam that kind of pain.
The Mother of All is in Oregon. So, Castiel zaps them there...and they drive around in a Chrysler that totally looked like one that my Dad used to own. We called it The Boat, and we left it parked up at my cottage and it got infested with snakes. ("I'M SICK OF THESE MOTHER FUCKING SNAKES IN THIS MOTHER FUCKING CHRYSLER"....is what I'm sure our welder friend said when he came to tour it away for parts).
I keep getting off track, I apologize.
First they go to a diner, and Sam gives Bobby an iPad to use - and I love Bobby's line about how computers have buttons. That's how I feel about iPads - though, I probably just feel that way because I can't afford one. Cas tries to locate the Mother by "searching the town" - and I love how in order to do this, all he has to do is stare into the middle distance....but it doesn't work, so he scrunches up his eyes...but nope, he's blocked.
Guys, I love de-mojoed Cas. Don't get me wrong, I like Cas as a BAMF too, but I really also like it when he's a poor helpless human who used to be powerful, but isn't anymore and is all woobie about it. That being said....Dean really needs to tone down the sarcasm/teasing with Castiel. WE know that there's affection behind it, but I don't think Cas does.
So, they split up to find this doctor who called the CDC or whatever...and both teams strike out - though Dean and Cas find a corpse, and Bobby and Sam find a cop. I liked Bobby being all FBI, even though he was dressed like the scrapyard hunter that he is. He really pulled it off.
They go to the first victims house to find copies of him all over...the last of which is dying. Sam and Dean talk to him....and guys, I really hate sick people on TV. It always makes me feel so disgusting. I would not make a good nurse, because I am too OCD. The whole time I'm sitting there thinking "Ugh! Don't breathe on the boys!" Dean's line about bathing in Purell was totally me.
At the bar next, they discover VAMPIRE WRAITHS! And OH MAN, THE BEST NAME FOR A MONSTER  IS BORN! Hahahaha...as per tradition in the scientific community, the person who discovers the new life-form/gene/planet/whatever gets to name it - and Dean decides that instead of some portmanteau like Vaiths or Wraipires, he's going to call them "Jefferson Starships, because they suck and they're hard to kill!"
And the best part - the best part is that because no one take the time to think of something better, they then all HAVE TO CALL THEM THAT for the rest of the episode. I absolutely loved that moment in the police station when Sam realizes that the cops are monsters and he has that moments pause as he tries to worn Cas and Bobby where you just see him thinking "I can't believe I'm going to call them this, but..."
Also, SAMMY TAKES THEM OUT WITH HIS HEAD! I love BAMF!Sam, seriously...that was some sexy shit right there.
Someone, I forget who now...Sam? Thinks to keep one to interrogate them. 
Then Sam and Dean discover two wittle boys who are all "we are cute and adorable and we totally remind you of yourselves...won't you pwease help us?"
So Sam and Dean take off to drive the boys to their uncle's or somewhere...and Bobby says a cool line, which is something along the lines of "You don't LET Sam and Dean do anything. They do what they want."
I like that line because Sam and Dean really do completely represent the idea of Free Will - for better and for worse. They do what they want, and sometimes what they want is a GOOD decision, and sometimes what they want is a mistake - but regardless, at the end of the day, you have to respect them for not being controlled.
And I really kept waiting for those kids to turn on Sam and Dean - but instead we kept getting all these cute scenes and long "I appreciate everything you've ever done from me" looks from Sam to Dean...and you start to think, "You know, it'd be kind of nice if they could just have this...if those kids could just actually be innocent kids."
Meanwhile, Cas has mastered sarcasm and has also mastered interrogative techniques - and it's around here that I started to get a LITTLE suspicious of what exactly Cas has been up to the last little while...because, well, I know angels are a bit amoral most of the time, but at least in On The Head of a Pin, Cas looked REALLY uncomfortable about the whole torture situation.
Anyway, they get an address and then they all head over to the diner...and Sam and Dean decide to go in, with Bobby and Cas as outside backup. 
Oh guys! I forgot to talk about the bullets! Dean made FIVE phoenix ash bullets! I couldn't help but think "Dean, maybe if you made SMALLER GAUGE BULLETS the ash would STRETCH FURTHER! I mean REALLY?! JUST FIVE CHANCES?!?"
And sure enough, the first thing Eve does is confiscate Sam and Dean's shot-guns...and that's what, two of the five bullets right there?
Then Eve talks to them...and what she says is actually revelatory. She was fine with the way things were, but only decided to wreak revenge on the world when her monsters/first-borns started to be tortured at the hands of Crowley (and brought in by the Winchesters). SURPRISING FACT #1: Crowley is still alive!
Also, Eve morphs into their mother! Older!Mary. Yay! She's cool. (My sister will be pleased when she watches the episode. She has a girl-crush on Samantha Smith.)
She offers to have the Winchesters work for her in defeating Crowley, and they won't be killed...and neither will Bobby and Cas. Also, she tells Cas that she's older than angels (or did she just say she's been around long enough to know how they work?....this is interesting for the debate about whether or not Eve is THE EVE or whether she's someone else entirely)...and that as long as she's around, Cas will be powerless. Part of me really wanted Cas to be powerless for the last four episodes, I'll be honest - I really do have a thing for human!Cas.
Anyway...that doesn't make a difference, because Dean tells her to bite him, and she does! And then we discover that DEAN HAS TURNED HIMSELF INTO MOTHER-POISON.
Seriously - say what you want about Dean - every once in a while, he's a frickin' genius strategist. I guess after being turned into a Vampire and abducted by fairies, he figured he'd try to make himself as protected as possible - he DRANK a shot-gun shell's worth of Phoenix Ashes - and apparently that was enough to fuck with his blood stream.  Still, that's a pretty dangerous game - what if drinking Phoenix ashes turned you into a Phoenix or something? That'd be cool (AUs GO! typity type type type....)
Now I have all KINDS of questions - does this mean that the monsters can't be created anew anymore? I mean, once you destroy the alpha vamp and all the other vamps, there'd be no one to create new vamps...does this mean that there is going to be an increasingly limited supply of monsters?! Have Sam and Dean given an expiration date on the Huntering lifestyle?! Are they like the last of the Dodo Hunters now?!
Ok...before my head explodes. Castiel kills all the monsters, and I love the "SHUT YOUR EYES" and the big BAMFness of his killing-monsters move. Seriously...I have a real conundrum when it comes to Cas - I love him as a BAMF!angel, but I also love him as a helpless human.
They go to the orphan's place to kill the secretly-evil boys, and find them already dead with sulphuric traces left behind. DEMONS...and Sam is right, demons don't just kill monsters because they feel like it - they had to be under orders. 
Castiel plays innocent, but as soon as the Mother had said that Crowley was alive and that it was "all about the souls", I believed her and I started to think that Castiel and Crowley were secretly in cahoots. That was one elaborate death they staged, but staged it was...because Castiel leaves in a huff after playing innocent, and he goes back to the diner where Crowley is waiting for him...apparently disappointed that he had to clean up one of Castiel's messes YET AGAIN. 
Also, kudos to Mark, for once again (I believe) keeping his name out of the credits so that his arrival was a complete shock.
Meanwhile, back at the house in the middle of nowhere with two dead kids and no car, and now no zapping angel....Bobby and Sam are starting to think along the same lines as me...there's a good chance that Cas is tangled up with Crowley in someway and he can't be trusted. Dean isn't hearing it though, because guys, Cas is his ONLY FRIEND and BFF and his own personal angel who saved him from hell...and and...Dean's in denial. In an effort to keep the peace, Sam says that it's "nothing"...but I'm wondering how long that's going to last.
So, theory time: Castiel had something to do with Sam coming back from Hell soulless. He wasn't upset at Dean for putting the soul back in because it endangered Sam's life. He was angry because he wanted the soul for something else, or he needed soulless Sam for something else...or something. 

Also, I'm totally calling the birth of a bunch of Cas/Crowley shippers...what's that one going to be called? Does it already have a name? Casley? Crowstiel? Hahaha...oh god...I am not going to read any of it. I really don't like slash in this fandom, guys, I'm sorry.
Random note: I love when Dean referred to Cas as "Smitey McSmiterson" - because I use that all the time...just today I was talking to my sister about a cover letter for a job, and was worried that it made me seem too "Smarty McSmartypants" for the position. I also use it a lot when driving "What's with Slow McSlowerson?"
But yes, the moral of the story is that CAS IS UP TO NO GOOD! Seriously...what is Cas up to!?! "All's fair in love and war" is just a saying, Castiel...it's not actually TRUE. Otherwise we wouldn't put people on trial for WAR CRIMES. Oh man oh man....

So, what did you guys think? Theories and speculation in the comments please! BUT NO SPOILERS! And no theories BASED on spoilers...seriously, I don't want "well, according to some stuff I've heard, I think that that Dean is going to...." NO SPOILERS WHATSOEVER!
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