Specific Feedback Request

[hells_half_acre]

Hello everyone who read my story "[Poll #1645669]The decision to change verb tenses at the end was actually one I made AS I POSTED. So, I'm still not sure whether I like the decision or not. Also, as you can see, I'm not sure I like the title either.

Don't worry about offending me - I have 34 comments on that story telling me how awesome it is, so I'm more than capable of taking a pinch of criticism along with all that praise ;)

Comments

[alexseanchai]

I noticed the vanishing punctuation. I didn't notice the verb tense.

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

Hahah, if you feel like pointing out places where I should have punctuation and I don't, go right ahead :P

That being said, I've been slowly editing it over the course of the past two days...so, depending when you first read it, it might look slightly different now. (Though, it was mostly typos and word choice that I edited, not punctuation.)

[katsheswims.livejournal.com]

I read it in two sittings because I had to run to class, so I didn't notice. Though I did think the end had a slightly sifferent feel to it (maybe it was because of the tenses?) though I just assumed it was because things were happy again!

[katsheswims.livejournal.com]

I also suggested the title "Real Things". I guess because Sam was having trouble believeing he was out of Hell and Dean was real. And Dean was having to deal with the reality of having Sam back, but broken (and maybe never fixed) and the issues that went along caring for him.

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

I like your suggestion! I've gotten a few good ones...but I like your line of thinking. Maybe I'll change it along the same lines...

For the life of me, I can't really remember why I chose the title I did. I don't really like it anymore. :P

Thanks for the feedback!

[werty30.livejournal.com]

I thought the verb change to present was symbolic of Sam being back to normal.

As for the title, the story brings to mind a line from Carry on my wayward son -- Once I rose above the noise and confusion.

[hells-half-acre.livejournal.com]

I thought the verb change to present was symbolic of Sam being back to normal.

'Twas indeed! I'm coming around to it actually. I think I'll keep it that way.

And ooo....I like that. Hmm...so far I like the suggestion of "Real Things", something to do with "the way home" and I like that reference to Carry On....hmmm...decisions decisions.