hells_half_acre: (Sam strung-out)
[personal profile] hells_half_acre

I'm back!  Ok, so I'm having a bit more difficulty remembering this one, also it's a little bit difficult to type...but don't worry! Once I get into the swing of things, I'm sure my coordination and memory will return....

So, we start off with..um...Sam getting a text. I'm not sure what the boys were doing BEFORE the text, but they've left Bobby's and...oh, they were discussing the fact that there was nothing going on. So, they've left Bobby's but with no particular destination...when Sam receives a text with coordinates from an unknown number....

Girls have gone missing, but Dean doesn't want to follow up because it's fishy...but Sam thinks they should...so, they drive to the place and Sam starts having MEMORIES from when he was soulless....

Oh, man! We don't start off with the text at all! We started off with a flashback to soulless Sam beating the crap out of that poor young police officer! MAN! Soulless Sam is scary. This episode actually made me feel bad for Grandpa Campbell, because he really got the wrong impression of his grandson...plus, from the looks of the numerous memories, Sam really steamrolled him whenever they were together. It was Sam's way, or the highway...

Anyway, Sam starts remembering this as he gets to town, and Dean is freaked. They stop in a restaurant and Dean discovers Sam in the background of a polariod on the wall...and that makes me wonder...how many pictures do you think Sam and Dean end up in the background of? I used to think of this while I traveled...how many pictures in how many countries do I end up in? Just another tourist in the background of another tourist's photo...how many people are in our tourist photos? How many different people have we captured in time who we don't even know?...ok, I'll stop getting philosophical....

Sam remembers doing the nasty with the dudes wife...and Dean sees Sam in the photo, and he wants to get the hell out of town. Apparently John taught them not to "use the same crapper twice"....um, guys, you've hunted in the same town a couple of time....maybe it depends on population? :P I love Sam's response that they DO use the same crapper twice....hilarious.

Maybe I'm skipping ahead here, but it turns out Sam slept with ladies in this town. Oh Soulless Sam...you are all lust and cold anger. I think I've fingered out what Soullessness means on Supernatural...it means you do all the things you have the urge to do. Like, when I'm having a bad day and I feel like reaching my hand into someone ribcage, and pulling out their heart while staring into their terrified eyes...if I were soulless, I would actually DO THAT. Luckily I have a soul, so I know that insides would feel really gross underneath my fingernails, and also I know that my hand is not strong enough to pieces someone's ribcage...and also I would feel bad about killing someone and I don't want to go to jail....

So, where was I? 

Dean goes and talks to the ladies and finds out about Sam's sexploits, and Sam goes to talk to the police department and gets arrested by the dude he beat up. 

So, Sam's wasting away in jail feeling sorry, and then the former Sheriff's wife shows up to confront him...Sam remembers telling her and her husband the truth, and she sets him free...

Then the wife Sam messed around with is taken...

I like Sam constantly almost killing Dean in this episode...that sounds wrong, but you know what I mean. 

So, Dean orders Sam to stay, but of course Sam doesn't listen...soul or no soul, Sam's never been good at the "stay" command. He's like my sister's dog that way. 

He takes back off to the Sheriff's wife's house, and more memories come back...he knows he's dealing with some sort of human arachnid monster...and here's where I'm officially freaked out in this episode. I'm REALLY glad that Supernatural does not have the budget for high-quality non-human-looking monsters....when Sam left the house and was edging towards that web, I was totally just as terrified as he was...

And then Dean comes up and almost gets killed again...oh Dean.

So, Sam knows the monster...and he knows he messed up the last time....and he needs to make things right...

I feel bad for Sam...jumping into that pit was supposed to be the ultimate atonement. It was supposed to make up for Sam's very existence, for all his mistakes and short-comings...and instead it just unleashed a whole bunch of new mistakes and shortcomings to make up for. Sam's perpetual guilt-machine....no matter how hard he tries, he's always to blame for something and can never make up for it...

Back at the abandoned house they are squatting in, Sam starts remembering...he remembers investigating with Samuel...using Roy/Rob/Sheriff for bait. 

My friend pointed out that Grandpa Campbell references "red shirts" here...which means, folks, that Grandpa Campbell is a trekkie.

Sam uses the sheriff for bait, assumes that he and the rest of the men have been poisoned, and mercy kills them all with a shot to the head....and yeah...first of all, I was like "that's a pretty bold assumption there Soulless!Sam" but then later, of course, I realized I should have said "Wow. can't believe Soulless!Sam should have made that assumption even bolder!"

Because the Sheriff shows back up at home...all scarred and burned and gross...and him and his wife lure Sam back...and we find out that the arachnid thing was breeding, not eating. Sam didn't kill one monster, he let a bunch escape with bullet-wound and burn scars...and then Sheriff-arachnid created even more when he stole the girls to lure Sam back to town....

Dean and Sam kill the Sheriff though, but the Sheriff's wife isn't about to grant Sam the forgiveness that he's seeking...and, well, I hate to be the one to tell Sam this, but he's not ever going to get forgiveness for a lot of the things he's body and brain did while he was out. Hopefully someday he'll be able to come to terms with that and get off the guilt-train.

This leads us into the discussion about whether Soulless Sam was Sam or not. Dean says it wasn't Sam. Sam says it was. I think they're both right. Personally, I know I would never rib someone's heart out of their ribcage with my bare hands, but I also know that when I'm frustrated or angry I often fantasize about it. I'd also never kill myself, but when I'm horribly depressed, I think about it. I'd never prostitute myself, but when I'm low on cash, I think about it. So....is that part that's thinking about those things me? Yes, they are my thoughts. If I lost the part of myself that prevented me from doing those things, would I still be me, or would I be someone else?

I think we've had this discussion before with Supernatural...if your loved one becomes someone else, through mental-illness or otherwise, do you still love them? Can it still be considered them? If you marry someone who becomes an angry alcoholic, is that angry alcoholic the person you married? No....but they are IN the person you married...the person you married is capable of BECOMING that. Is Soulless Sam just a version of Sam that was raised differently? Is he a version of Sam that Sam COULD have become?

Anyway, as we contemplate this (or not) Dean and Sam have a great exchange about Dean asking Sam if he needs anything, and Sam complaining that Dean's being too nice or something...and Dean has a great line about "just trying to make you feel better, you don't have to be a bitch about it" and it's so nice to have brotherly banter back....

And then Sam collapses in a memory-induced seizure.

No, I know people who are epileptic, and I'm sure they feel for Sam here....but the person I feel for is Dean, because I know people who are epileptic and I know how terrifying it is when something goes wrong and they collapse...

The wall didn't hold up very long folks...because these memories make Soulless Sam look like a picnic in the park. In these memories, Sam is on fire...

And I guess we have to wait until next week to find out if Sam survives....

...or, you know, just watch the preview for next week :P

Hope you all enjoyed the episode. Judging by comments on my previous post, it sounds like there were audio problems for some of you :(

PS: I should mark where I started using lyrics for my cut-text and run a contest to see who can correctly name the most songs.
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